Summary
Highlights
Jamila Musayeva introduces the importance of table manners, defining them as behavior around the table, including cutlery use, eating habits, and conversation. She emphasizes that good table manners help you feel comfortable and make others at ease, regardless of the dining formality.
Guests should wait for the host to indicate their seat, with guests of honor receiving the best view. Proper posture includes sitting straight with shoulders back, not pressing your back against the chair, and avoiding placing elbows on the table while eating (though it's acceptable during breaks for conversation). Hands should remain visible, either in your lap (American etiquette) or with wrists resting on the table (French etiquette).
Keep phones silenced and put away from the table. Large bags can be placed on a separate chair or bag holder. Small clutch bags can be placed on your lap and covered with a napkin. Never place your bag on the ground, as it is considered disrespectful in some cultures.
Learn how to navigate a formal table setting, identifying different cutlery for soup, salad, main course, and dessert, as well as a bread plate with a butter knife. Use the 'B' and 'D' finger trick to distinguish your bread plate and glasses from your dining partners'.
Unfold your napkin an place it on your lap, with folded lines facing inwards for easier stain concealment. Use it to gently wipe fingers and dab lips. If leaving temporarily, place the napkin on your chair; if leaving permanently, place it loosely folded to the left of your plate. If you drop your napkin, you can pick it up or ask for a new one.
Understand the different types of glasses: water goblets (held by the bottom of the bowl), champagne flutes (held by the stem to maintain bubbles and temperature), white wine glasses (held by the stem to keep the wine cool), and red wine glasses (larger and shorter, held by the bottom of the bowl to allow the wine to breathe).
Wait for the host or all guests to be served before starting to eat. Use the butter knife for bread, taking one bite at a time. For soup, dip the spoon in the center, bring it to the opposite edge, and then to your mouth. Two styles of eating are shown for salad: American (cutting one bite, switching fork to the dominant hand) and European/Continental (holding both fork and knife throughout the meal). Always cut and eat one piece of food at a time. To signal completion of a course, place your fork and knife in a 12 to 6 o'clock or 10 to 4 o'clock position on the plate.
After the main course, you can excuse yourself for the bathroom before dessert. Use the dessert fork as a holder and the dessert spoon to cut and eat. To signal for the bill, make eye contact or subtly raise your hand. When leaving, loosely fold your napkin and place it to the left of your plate. The host indicates when it's time to leave.
Always send a thank-you message to the host the day after a dinner. For an exceptional experience, consider sending flowers with a handwritten thank-you note, as it leaves a lasting impression.